…”If only we’d known then what cocky little pricks they’d turn out to be”
WASHINGTON—Only a few short years after being removed from the endangered species list, the American peregrine falcon—once considered a creature of nobility and grace—has transformed into an “unappreciative jerk,” wildlife experts reported Monday.
According to workers at the Peregrine Fund, a nonprofit organization dedicated to protecting falcons around the world, the predatory bird has exhibited a complete change in attitude since its resurgence. Animal advocates have reportedly observed the falcon flaunting its magnificent 3.5-foot wingspan, nesting arrogantly atop nearby cliffs, and generally acting like “king shit” wherever it goes.
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